Shed the baggage...

There comes a time in everyone’s life, when one must drop whatever one is doing and take stock of, well, literally, one’s life. Think about it, we carry on with our lives…chasing our dreams and ambitions, working hard and in the process accumulating baggage; we don’t even realise we have collected. Over a period of time the baggage keeps getting heavier & heavier, weighing us down, slowing us down and yet we ignore it and carry on. Until it becomes impossible to go on, it’s time to stop, take stock and to decide to unload.

And we need to do this, both literally and figuratively…

We go through life collecting all kinds of hurts, broken promises, and unfulfilled dreams, the burden of which, keeps adding and weighing us down. This unnecessary weight prevents us from moving forward; achieving our dreams and quite literally it prevents us from being happy. So why not just dump this unnecessary load? And march ahead? The time is now to stop worrying about the past and start living.

Don’t be bogged down by past mistakes. They don’t define you; they just mean that you were not afraid to take a chance. Learn the lesson and move on. Always remember, if you are not making mistakes…well then you are not doing much with your life.

Let go of relationships that don’t help you grow as a person. Any relationship should be a source of happiness, encouragement, it should nurture & cherish. But if relationships are sucking the life out of you…why drag. There will always be people who would readily dress up and party with you…but in your moment of grief are busy with the work-family-house routine. It’s a good idea to let them go. Forgive people who hurt you, not for them but to free yourself. Anger is a poison that you take and then expect someone else to suffer! If the relationship is not fulfilling…it’s not worth the effort.

Still crying over missed opportunity? Still worrying about what could have been instead to thinking about what is? Living in the past, while the present slips away? This one is not difficult to figure out, is it?

And while you are clearing the mind-baggage don’t forget to literally shed some baggage. I am talking about the excess baggage that our body carries.

Unless riddled by genetic problems, there is no excuse to be overweight. Especially in the times we are living. Hectic, stressful professional life, the torturous traffic, city living, pollution all sucking the life out of us. The newspapers are full of people suffering from cardiac conditions as early as in the 30s.

So stop hiding behind excuses and take a walk, climb the stairs, join the yoga class, pick an apple instead of that brownie and eat at home as much as possible!

You owe it not only to yourself but also to your family.

Live happy and travel light!

The time is...NOW

Always waiting for the 1st of the month, Monday, New year, birthday or anniversary or just the "right day" to start something new? Stop waiting and start now...because the right time to start something...anything is right NOW...

Now is the time...

...to realise your dreams, your long standing wishes and desires. When you can start now, why wait for tomorrow?

...to get fit, to join the gym, to join the yoga class, to lose weight.

...to get back to a hobby, dust the tennis racket, bring out the paint brushes or fine tune the sitar. It's time to rediscover yourself.

...to pick up the phone and call a friend. The best way to wish someone on a birthday is not by writing on their FB wall, but to make a call.

...to meet a friend for coffee.

...to let go of past hurt, to put down the baggage and get rid of it for good. Time to let go.

...to stop worrying about what will be. It's time to live in the present.

...to laugh a bit more.

...to mend broken relationships. Life is too short to nurse old grudges.

...to go travelling, meet new people, to sample different cuisine.

...to get out of your comfort zone and discover a whole new world.

The time is right to start living. The time is NOW.

Penny for your thoughts...

Well, had I collected a penny for every bit of irrelevant, bizarre and downright ridiculous advice I have been given…let’s just say my bank would be very pleased with me!
Everyone is so quick to dispense advice, almost like a birth right, a sacrosanct ritual, without which one’s day would be bland and completely lacking. Almost like food without salt Unthinkable!

What is even more amazing is the absolute authority with which and the lightning speed at which, people dispense their verbal gems.

When should Sachin retire? How should the country be run? How do we handle the whole Pakistan-Kashmir issue? What is the truth behind the Devyani Khobragade fiasco? Blah blah blah and then some.

Now don’t get me wrong, I am totally for opinions, debates even arguments. But some are so nauseatingly stupid that one can’t help but puke.

Of course, it pinches more when supposedly well-meaning friends and relatives seem to know how to run your life better than you!

People are terribly worried these days about how I will spend my old age and, dear lord, who will take care of me & hubby. Let me explain…what I mean.

I am well into my 30’s and don’t have a kid. Hubby & I have gone from adopting a kid to not wanting a kid to maybe wanting to kidnap one for a week or two without ransom.
A personal choice which is not required to be explained to all & sundry, but then it doesn't work like that, does it now?

So everyone has taken it upon themselves to drill some sense in my obviously empty head.

A very concerned well-wisher asks if I have thought about this decision. Have I seen a gynecologist? Do I know the biological clock is ticking furiously? Err no…I was just waiting for someone smart like you to come along and advise, moron!

Another time when people are happily advising is when one is expecting. When my sister was expecting…we were drowned in a deluge of sometimes-sane-most-times-stupid-advice.

She had a C-section due to a last minute emergency. Of course many people thought her doctor was stupid to suggest it.

We should have waited, we should have protested and, best for the last…we should have taken a 2^nd opinion!

Seriously? Didn't know there were so many closet doctors!
Of course these are serious issues and people can’t help themselves.

But even when it comes to mundane stuff people can’t resist their urge to split their lips and pour the wise wine of words.

Which car to buy, where to vacation, how to spend one’s weekend (Yes, believe me…I have been advised on how & where to spend it!).

A simple thing they miss is…if I really needed their pearls of wisdom; would I not ask them?! Shouldn't the very fact that I did not call them before making a purchase, tell them that I don’t care much about what they think!

The next time someone starts with: “If you don’t mind me saying so…” I think I am going to go for the jugular. Guess what? I do mind, so shut up.

If I needed your advice, I will ask. Until then I can manage my life on my own. 

Thank you very much.

Ting tong...must be Jabong!

'Online' & 'shopping' were words that did not come together for me very often. The whole "shopping" experience began and ended at the malls and the internet was a place for social networking! At best, the thought of combining the two came when I had to buy books from Flipkart or tickets from Makemytrip.

I have always been skeptical about shopping online and buying things without the whole "touch & feel" experience. But this issue was taken care of by various online shopping portals, where one could order, open and check the product & try the garments at home and then make the payment. How convenient! Plus I realised that my teenage cousins were already shopping online for clothes and accessories and the most favoured destination was www.jabong.com ...I had to take the plunge!

Around the same time I was offered a Rs 500/- voucher from none other than Jabong! what luck!

Once you visit the website, you discover its simplicity and quickly realise that it is neatly organised making browsing and searching easy and hassle free. The website has a neat and clutter free look. Not to mention that the home page is teeming with offers...enough temptation to shop!

Given my fetish for skin care products, I was pleasantly surprised by the entire range on offer...totally spoilt for choice!

I chose Iraya body lotion and Soultree shower gel. Both the products reached me within 3-4 days. Also notice a sticker on the parcel; which said that I could check the contents before accepting the parcel. Good idea!

While regular shopping is great, don't forget to look out for discount coupons and other mouth watering offers on the website!

Also remember to pick up a thoughtful gift for your mother for mother's day. Jabong seems to have thought of some wonderful ideas...do check it out!

Happy shopping!

                                                                                                                                                            

Stay Connected

Stay Connected...

 

Now-a-days every time we hear the word "connected" the only thing that comes to mind is the Internet! Everyone seems to be connected online...obviously nothing wrong in that. What better way than to keep in touch and rediscover friends than on Facebook. I have met many long lost friends online...I don't think I would ever have met them had it not been for Facebook's helping hand. But that's not the kind of "connection" I am talking about. Is there another kind? you wonder. I think so. Let me explain.

 

We live in a world that is constantly on over-drive mode. Everyone is in a hurry. To get somewhere. To get something done. There is always a rush for meetings, appointments, sales targets, client meetings. Where is the time to pause and think? We all seem to be stuck in a rut, but how many of us want to get out of this rut? Get out of the rat race and connect with our 'self'. Not many of us can give it all up and become farmers and artists and turn our backs on peer pressure. But every once in a while, wont it be better to reconnect with your 'self'? Take time out to rethink your priorities, goals and ambitions? Go for a walk with yourself. Spend a few more "doing-nothing" moments. Stay connected with yourself', before you lose yourself.

 

In a mad rush to succeed we not only lose connection with ourselves but also with our near & dear ones. People who should matter to us the most...our family. We work crazy hours, impossible deadlines to earn a better living for our families. Sure money is important for all our needs and wants, but so is being emotionally connected. A sick person does not get cured by medicine alone, but also due to the nurturing by loved ones. People with families live longer...so why just settle for a weekend marriage? or weekend parenting? If family is the the corner stone of civilization, make sure you give it due priority. Stay connected with family; before its too late.

 

Hundreds of friends on Facebook, hundreds of "likes" on inane status updates and photos. And most importantly hundreds of birthday wishes. And how many phone calls for birthday wishes and heart to heart conversations? Not all friends on Facebook expect a phone call, but everyone has a few special friends who deserve a call every once in a while, especially on their birthdays and special occasions. Take time out to make that phone call, attend weddings, birthday parties, get-togethers. Stay connected with friends..and I am talking Facebook here.

 

In school, everything seems possible, no dream is too outrageous, everything is fun...a child-like delight & enthusiasm that seems to conquer all. In school we also have "hobbies" which we seem to drop as we collect other baggage. Everyone in school looks forward to the sports/games period. Aah, finally time to leave behind the confinement of the classroom! Until its time to prepare for the board exams...sports is the first to be left behind. Annual day functions meant everyone was busy preparing a skit, a musical or a dance performance, but the pursuit of a career means all such 'frivolous' activities took a back seat. Its understandable that not every one can make career in theatre, music, dance or sports, but we can still pursue them as recreational activities. Take a break from the rig-ma-role of daily life. Rediscover a hobby or pick up a new one. Stay connected with your passion. There is little else that gives more joy.

 

Stay connected. With everything that makes you 'you'

Nana nani ka ghar.

During our school-days, my sister and I, like all school going children, would eagerly look forward to our summer-vacations. Not only did this mean freedom to get up late but also meant that the annual trip to Saharanpur was finally around the corner. This was our nani ka ghar; and nothing could bring us more joy than this trip. I am talking about time way back in the 80s. Much before the advent of internet & TV even; so there were no makemytrip.com or yatra.com to entice with vacation deals. Add to this the fact that my father was posted in places like Dhule & Jalgaon …far far away from Saharanpur. So such trips happened only once a year.

The preparation for the trip would start weeks in advance. My mother would start collecting stuff. Poha, chakli, sabudana, chivda…all would be part of our luggage. At that time all these ingredients were not available up north. Add to these individual gifts for all family members. Now all the ladies of the extended family are proud owners of the paithani saree! We kids would have our own packing to do. Apart from the clothes, we would select some toys to accompany us along with our school books; that we never get around to studying is quite another matter! And let’s not forget the excitement of packing for the train journey itself. The day of travel saw frantic activity in the kitchen…mom would get up early morning to prepare the quintessential sookhe aloo ki subzi and fry enough pooris. Oh and let’s not forget the aam ka achar; along with this my sister and I would pack chocolates and toffees, which we had been collecting for days! As the time approached to board the train, we could barely contain our excitement. Once we had boarded, settled in, we wanted to eat…once done we would finally calm down and eagerly await our arrival at New Delhi railway station. We would alight here and continue the rest of the journey by road.

Finally, after a restless travel of more than 24 hrs we arrive at Saharanpur. And what a resounding welcome we would receive. My grandmother would have prepared our favourite meal, and immediately we would become the centre of attention. Of course another ritual was opening of the luggage; which everyone eagerly looked forward to!! My mom has two brothers and a sister; all younger to her. We as kids were quite a novelty to them and their college friends! We had a wonderful time going out with them and would be treated to all kinds of yummy street food.

Another high point of visiting Saharanpur was that we could watch TV (TV transmission began in Dhule only in 1984). I remember patiently waiting for 6:00 pm; the time transmission began. We would religiously watch all the programs, including Krishi Darshan, and would only sleep after wishing the presenter "shubhratri".

Looking back, even without Internet or 24 hour TV channels, we were never bored, nor did the power cuts bother us despite the scorching heat of May. The afternoons were spent waiting for the  ice cream wala...the taste of the orange chuski still fresh in my mind.

The fondest memory of Saharanpur is of spending time with our grandfather. A stickler for routine, he was much feared by all in the family, but we girls could get away with almost anything! The best time was when he was having his meals. We would sit on either side and listen to his stories. He has migrated from Pakistan after the partition, and would talk fondly of his childhood and boyhood days. He would eat rotis laden with ghee and urged us to do the same…much to our dismay. Most evenings, if we were not going out with our aunt & uncles, grandpa took us out for a walk; where we would meet his friends…some from the pre-partition era! These walks inevitably ended with a glass of sugarcane juice. Spending time with him was also fun; not only did he regale us with stories and anecdotes, but also with nuggets of wisdom and practical advice.

We also had a no. of friends in Saharanpur, usually neighbours or the kids of our mother’s childhood friends. We eagerly looked forward to meeting them too. They would be quite amused by our hindi, sprinkled with Marathi words!

And before we knew it, it seemed that our vacation had gotten over far too soon. Hadn’t we just arrived? And now we were packing to go back! Not fair! Going back our luggage would be equally heavy…garam masala (from all the things, this is one thing I remember distinctly), pickles that my grandmother had made, all the knick knacks that my uncles & aunts had collected for us, the sweater that my granny had knitted for papa and various other tiny things would fill up our bags. My uncles would come to drop us at New Delhi railway station; of course goodbyes were never easy.

Once back home it took the longest to get back to routine…having been spoilt rotten for the entire vacation. Since there was no internet or phone, we would desperately wait for letters from Saharanpur, and if any had news of visiting relatives; our joy would know no bounds.

It’s been years since we went back to Saharanpur. My aunt and uncles got married and shifted away from home. After my grandfather passed away, the house was sold, and the last connection to Saharanpur was lost. I don’t know if we would ever go back, but looking back no other vacation has brought me more joy and happiness. Probably it was so special because it was my nana-nani ka ghar!

My DD Memories...

Long before our lives were ruled by the cablewala, set top boxes, DTH, HD and blah blah blah, Doordarshan was the only TV channel, and for people of my generation a huge part of our lives. We could not wait for the evening to come when a huge ball of orange slowly truned into the Doordarshan logo, I clearly remember as kids my sister and I would eagerly look forward to our summer vacations to our nani's home in Saharanpur. Ofcourse there was the joy of going to nana, nani ke ghar, this was doubled by the fact that we could watch TV there. You see at the time all the places my father was posted (Jalgaon, Dhule), had no TV transmission. TV only came to Dhule in 1984. Until we had to contend with the B/W TV of my grandparents! We would religiously watch krishi darshan, the hindi samachar, I love lucy and only go to bed after bidding the anchor shubhratri!

Our world changed with the TV coming to Dhule, 1984, around the time the first hindi serial (that is what we called soaps then!) "Hum Log" came on air. Hosted by the veteran actor Ashok Kumar, "Hum Log", with its middle class ethos, became a part of our daily lives. It was a story about a middle class family, in Delhi, trying to make ends meet. It had the eldest and the most pampered child (laloo), the responsible elder daughter (badki), the ambitious majhli, the intelligent chutki, and light-eyed cutie-pie nanhe played by Abhinav Chaturvedi, the grandparents, drunkard father with his long suffering wife! Till today Vinod Nagpal is known as Basesar Ram and Sushma Seth as dadi! Coming to think of it almost of the actors of Hum Log are till today known by their screen names. A testament to the love and affection showered on them by the whole country.

Of course there was no looking back after Hum Log. Manohar Shyam Joshi, who wrote Hum Log, created magic again with Buniyaad; directed by Ramesh “sholay” Sippy. Another mega-serial; this time about a family dealing with the repercussion of the partition. Many serials have been made with the parition theme, but unfortunately none managed to create the magic of Buniyaad. How can we ever forget Master Haveliram (Alok Nath), the khadi-clad-idealistic eldest son of a wealthy businessman who is interested in the freedom struggle? And then there is the chirpy Lajjoji (Anita Kanwar), her friend and masterji's sister veerawali (Kiran Juneja). The serial deals with Haveliram's struggle to hold on to his ideologies and his duty towards his family. After the partition the family moves to Delhi and new characters are added, Masterji & Lajjoji's sons played by Dalip Tahil, Mazhar Khan and Kanwaljeet. Mazhar Khan will always be remembered for his character to a happy-go-luckly fellow, who is always eager to make a quick buck! While Alok Nath went on to become the lovable father of hindi serials and Rajshree films, unfortunately Anita Kanwar disappeared into oblivion, and Kiran Juneja, famously went on to marry the producer of the serial, the much older Ramesh "sholey" Sippy.

While talking about partition, the one name the immediately comes to mind is the hard-hitting Tamas, written by Padma Bhushan Bhisham Sahani (the younger brother of veteran actor Balraj Sahani). A very serious look at the partition, this serial attracted the who's who of the acting fraternity. Bhisham Sahani himself acted in the serial along with Dina Pathak, Om Puri, Amrish Puri, Surekha Sekri, Uttara Baokar, Deepa Sahi. This epic serial was directed by Govind Nihalani.

At the time Doordarshan serials were weekly, running into 13, 26 or 52 episodes, this trend was changed by the mega serials Ramayan & Mahabharat. Once they were on air Sundays were never the same again. Ramayan was produced by Sagar Arts and starred Arun Govil and Deepika Chiklia as Ram & Seeta and the indomitable Daara Singh as Hanuman (can't think of anyone else as Hanuman, can we now?!). Cities wore a deserted look on Sunday mornings when Ramayan was aired, as if a curfew has been imposed, and there dare not be a power-cut for the half hour! Recently Imagine TV also produced Ramayan, but could not capture the audience's attention as the earlier one. An original is an original, after all!

The mega-serial was soon followed by another epic, of truly gigantic proportions...Mahabharat, produced by B R Films. Producing this serial must have truly been a herculean task, for Mahabharat has no. of stories woven into one. Very soon Mahabharat commanded the same attention as Ramayan and soon on every Sunday, Suresh Wadekar echoed from every television. Harish Bhimani was the voice of "time", who acted as the narrator of the tale. People waited with bated breaths, wondering who will play the "pandavas", initially disappointed but soon warmed upto them. Nitish Bahardwaj played "Krishna" and till today finds himself bound by the image.

This was the time of weekly episodes, not daily soaps and "maha episodes". Everyone waited eagerly for their favourite ones. Much before ACP Pradyumna and his "daya darwaza tod do" CID gang came to investigate crime, Karamchand jasoos had already made his mark. Along with his scatter-brained secretary Kitty, he solved many-a-complex murders. Pankaj Kapur & Sushmita Kitty Mukherjee made an unlikely crime-fighting team, which endeared themselves to the audiences.

DD also supported a whole genre of comedy. Good clean family entertainment unlike the comedy shows of today, which rely heavily on slapstick and double meaning dialogues. The top-of-the mind recall goes to Yeh Jo Hai Zindagi. Who can rival this iconic serial? The serial written by comedy writer Sharad Joshi starred Shafi Inamdar and Swaroop Sampat as the husband wife duo Ranjit and Renu Verma. The serial also starred Rajesh Bedi as Renu’s unmarried unemployed brother, while Satish Shah played a different part in each serial…and enthralled everyone with his comic timing!

While talking about the comedy genre, it would be sacrilegious not to talk about Nukkad…a serial about a street corner; which could have been anywhere in an Indian metro. The daily trials and tribulations of the residents of this street corner managed to make a place in every DD watching Indian’s heart. The serial co-directed by Kundan Shan and Saeed Mirza, starred Dilip Dhawan (the heart of gold “Guru”), Rama Vij (lovable teacherji), Avtar Gill and Pavan Malhotra amongst many other memorable characters.

And then there was “Wagle Ki Duniya” ; a satirical take on the struggle of the common man. Starring Anjan Srivastave and Bharati Achrekar, this serial soon became a mass favourite.

I remember serials on DD such as Ek Kahani, Darpan, Kathasagar; which featured adaptions of stories by award winning writers of Hindi and other regional languages. In today’s world of daily soaps and saas-bahu dramas, which cannot distinguish themselves from each other; one feels the need of powerful writing. There is no dearth of writers only experimental production houses. Maybe if they look beyond the “K” fascination! I wonder who would take the time and the effort that Govind Nihalani took to televise Jawahar Lal Nehru’s Discovery of India?

Talking about diversity in serials, I can’t help but remember Gul, Gulshan, Gulfam; which portrayed the life of a Kashmiri family making a living with their 3 house boats. The patriarch of the family was played by the very talented Parikshit Sahani and Radha Seth as his wife. The serial shot in Srinagar also starred Pankaj Berry, Neena Gupta and Kunal Khemu.

Looking back there are so many wonderful memories of DD; Many serials that became a part of our lives, conversations, heated debates and now our memories. Serials that gave us the badshah of Bollywood; Shah Rukh Khan (fauji, doosra Kewal). The quiz shows that everyone watched with rapt attention, the half an hour of cartoons on Sunday; that any day beat the 24 hr cartoon channels. Not to forget the Sunday movie, the chitrahaar…who needed MTV and channel V?! This was the time when DD ruled and the TV had not turned into the idiot box. The television actors of the time were not one-soap wonders, but were a talented group of actors who made their presence felt by strong characters. Today we may never see an actor again, nor remember their real names, but we will always remember Sudhir Pandey, Neena Gupta, Pavan Malhotra, Shafi Inamdar amongst many many other talented actors. DD might have lost its sheen in the glossy world of HD TV and 24 hr channel, but in my mind DD is a special memory which always puts a smile on my face. I might have missed so many serials which u might remember, do share ur special memories!